The one they left behind

When you get to a certain age, and I am at it, your friends start deserting you and having kids.  I'm not going to beat around the bush on this one.  I am lonely as a result of the inevitable urge to procreate.

Yes, I know my friends are still my friends.  But when they are unavailable for any social events ever again, unless it's afternoon tea round their house on a Saturday afternoon, realistically I have been abandoned.

It reminds me of a friend I lost many years ago.  I didn't change, but she found religion, in a big way.  That in itself would have been ok, but she was so into the religion thing that she was actually incapable of holding a conversation without steering it to that topic.  I held out for a while, but eventually the relationship had nowhere to go.  I found the topic of religion boring, she found it irresistibly fascinating to the point where she would send me religious propaganda.  The friendship had to end - and while I regret it to this day, I do maintain that it was not my fault - I didn't change, she did.

The same is true of the friends having babies.  Now I don't mind a conversation about nappy changing, but I am just not very interested in it.  What I am interested in is going to the cinema, spontaneous drinking sessions, weekend ski trips, whole days out walking, the things I have been building my friendships around.  I have tried to involve friends with kids in these events, and yes, with effort and plenty of forward planning you can bring them along with you.  But somehow it feels that you are causing them enormous inconvenience in their life by forcing them out of their childhood routine, which I know is so important to little kids, and I am not sure that they thank you for it.  So unless I am willing to mould around their lifestyle of running around after small children, I don't have a social life.  Let's face it - I just don't have much in common with them any more.

I don't have many options from here on out.  I could continue to gradually atrophy friends.  I could move to a whole new set of friends.  I could join them and produce my own rugrat.
But whatever option I choose, staying still is not an option.  I guess I've just reached that point in my life where making no decision at all is not going to cut it.  Could this be the point where I grow up?